This week has definitely been a week when endorphins, dopamine and serotonin was high. I have laughed, I have felt accomplished and I have been extremely pleased with what I achieved last weekend.
The sheer magnitude of what I completed on Saturday 11 July only started to become apparent the days after the event. At first I think I was taken aback by all the energy I used to get me through. However as I started to recover and I had time to reflect – only then did I start to admire that woman who crossed the finish line. That woman was me and boy was I proud!
The week of realisation and accomplishment was added to with the sheer joy felt when medals and speeches were given. I was presented my medal by Sorrell and it really brought home how much I had achieved especially when you have a room of 200 odd crew members clapping and celebrating your success with you.
I had also posted a video of my ultra marathon which surprisingly received quite a bit of attention and with nearly 200 hits and comments of encouragement it can’t help but make you feel good.
The rest of the week saw me reveling in the glory of that Saturday with talks of what I had accomplished spread throughout the office and to my friends.
With that in mind, it was definitely time to treat myself. After months of trying to be good, training hard, eating well and abstaining from drink, I definitely felt I deserved a break. Therefore I thought I would reward myself with whatever I wanted to eat and my big drinking debut was planned for the weekend when I went to the Lovebox festival.
The thing is I have totally binged – sweets, chocolates, pastries, the lot. With me I feel it’s all or nothing. I can’t eat one bad thing and be content, instead I think if I eat one bad thing then I should eat several and start the next day afresh. The only problem is then it takes one slip to write that day off and so on. Therefore a day of not watching what I eat turned into a week of being naughty!
It didn’t help not being able to run because of my knee. At first I was quite worried about it but after leaving it, I realise that it was only bruised and I can now walk without limping. Therefore next week, I should be able to run and get back to some order as I have craved bad things all this week including cigarettes and realise that it is to do with not having something to focus on.
Lovebox was sort of my release, my time to be naughty, to have a few drinks, to let my hair down and just party because I felt like I earned it. This was my second time to Lovebox, it was in a way, a bit of an anti-climax for me. I think I had such a good time the first time I went with my ex, my sister and her partner that I had high hopes myself. It’s weird as I
met my ex at Lovebox who I thought was the love of my life at the time and then two years down the line I’m at the very same festival but single. Funny how tables turn! It was also my debut, my release back into the world of having fun after months of being a bore and because of this I thought it would be such a magical moment. Don’t get me wrong – I had a lovely time with friends and family but I just had very high expectations.
That coupled with a headache that was not showing me any mercy meant I had to leave early. As I tried to leave Lovebox after popping a few paracetamol I walked what seemed like ages and passed some great music tents along the way. It’s weird as I felt like I was walking around aimlessly trying to find the exit but couldn’t. In this time the headache started to wear off and I bumped into a few friends and decided to ditch the attempt to leave. I went back to my sister and friends but they were nowhere to be seen so I hung out with my friends, got some water and enjoyed the last act which was Snoop Dogg.
It was great to be in a festival with a big performer and although it was good – I really felt he let the crowds down. What happened to Snoop from back in the day? What happened to all his hits? The great albums such as Doggy Style? Instead he did a few but also replicated songs from other artists such as 50 Cent – P.I.M.P – I mean come on!! Snoop Doggy Dog or Snoop Lion, Snoopzilla or whatever your name is now – it would have been nice to hear a bit more of the Snoop Dogg we all grew up with and loved. However that’s me talking as a 33-year-old (nearly) and might not necessarily be a view of the younger generation to whom I think he was trying to please.
Today I am not exactly welcoming the effects of the weekend. Feeling lethargic with no motivation for anything are not the effects of alcohol I enjoy. Gosh I realise how great I used to feel everyday and miss it in a way. I’m not saying I am going to be a bore from now on but I will say that it takes a lot out of me so my boozing days will be very few and far between – hopefully!!