Why are things so complicated

Hope everybody had a great weekend? I did for most of it. As always I live for the weekend which flies by without so much as a blink. Why can’t we work for 3 days and have the other 4 off? Would it really muck the economy up- even more so then it currently is?

So friday was casino night- and the first time I stepped into a casino on the other side of the roulette table- yes I was croupier at one stage of my life but only for a while. Well it was okay and although I had previous exposure of how these table games can really affect you- I still had that desire to try to win back the money I had lost. Luckily enough it wasnt as much as some and I was rather pleased when the mini bus came back to pick us up and I wasnt 200 quid down like some of the rest of the gang. It was good and I did enjoy it but I definitely wont be doing that in a hurry.

So on to a club and copious drinks later – I was raring to go- if there was a table- I would be dancing on it. In fact I am getting flashbacks of being on the middle of the dance floor doing my Michael Jackson dance as I type. 🙂

Well I finally got to bed by 6.30am and had a few hours sleep before I rose out of my pit to greet my cousin and my friend who had come down from Surrey. So breakfast, shower and cup of tea later- I was feeling back to my old self and then it was girly time- drinks, gossip and lots of laughter – love it!

Sometimes I love my girls- it’s just pure fun and laughter, no pretense, no worries about being stupid or acting silly- just unrestricted laughter and feel good fun.

Sometimes I wish those moments could last forever, sometimes I wish that you could have those moments all the time- without stresses, without worry, without wondering what you are going to do in your life. Why can’t we live our lives as carefree as possible- remember when you were young- and when you laughed, it wasn’t fake, it wasn’t holding back, it was pure laughter. The laughter that made your sides hurt and your jaws ache. That’s the laughter I love.

I suppose in our younger years, there were no worries back then, no concerning yourself about your image or what you looked like or what others thought. No worries about what job, what education, what type of family and relationship you were going to have- just how much pocket-money you could save at the end of the week from your dinner money.

Well girls will be girls and we are very silly when we get together. You might see some pictures up on facebook taken of a tv screen with Phil Collins on it. Oh yes I was pretending that I was there screaming at Phil – ‘I love you’ and ‘its him’ and tickling his chin with my finger- yes I told you it was silly!! But doesn’t everybody do that? No? okay maybe just us but then I never said I or my family wasnt weird.

Does it bother men when girls act silly? Does it really aggravate them- because when acting silly and then observing the looks from any other guys who might be in the room- their faces definitely paint a picture. The type of picture where they either have a completely blank face or look like a slapped arse- after all it is incredibly silly and they couldn’t possibly join in and laugh!! Well boo hoo to you then- and one day you will learn how to crack that smile.

Anyway one thing I have learnt of late is do not come in between a man and his ‘match of the day’ oh my gosh- they go absolutely berserk if can’t watch it. I found this out the hard way – when my partner went downstairs, he was gone for quite a while and so the tv was turned over to cater for my cousin and friends needs- after all they were desks. He then came back upstairs and tried to turn it back over and that’s when I intervened. Well you should have seen the face – talk about spoilt brat……..and then there was the name calling “shut up”, “fuck off”. So again I did my usual “how dare you” and then the bastard called me a cunt……..

Of all the things – rule number one never call a lady that!!! He got chucked out the house and the next day a text message was delivered to his inbox advising him that I will not tolerate it anymore and that he needed to make his mind up on what he wanted to do with our relationship. I mean I am sure when you look back at this- you have heard me talk about argument after argument- surely there comes a time when you need to reassess it?

Well I never heard back from him so I assumed that he wanted to end it. I hate breakups, I just want it to be over. I dont think you can do that two and fro thing, seeing eachother- dragging up memories. It’s too painful- I need to make a decision, stick to it and not see them for a long time because when you see them then it all comes flooding back. I have asked him to go through my mother (sorry mum) but I need to just move on – I can’t deal with the arguing, can’t deal with the getting back together and then its all the same- just need to do it if we are doing it. 

He’s tried to contact me – probably to have an argument but he made it clear that he can’t be bothered and so I am hurrying the situation along now- there is no point in prolonging the pain. I just dont want to talk to him now- I need my space to get over him and talking is going to just hurt at the moment. Breakup’s are hard and complicated.

Anyway to new chapters……..

Talking of new chapters, I had a strange call from my friend who I havent seen in ages. He is doing really well from himself now but started talking about me being at crossroads (true) and that I can achieve what ever I put my head to. It’s so strange because I have been thinking about a change, not knowing where I’m going and just wanting to get out of the rat race. If anybody has ever read rich dad, poor dad then you will know what I mean. It was just so surreal- all what he had been telling me, is everything I have been thinking lately.

I just need to start focusing now and yes I will get that Bentley and riverside apartment. Bring it on!!!

On a lighter note- on my way to work this morning, there was lots of traffic, so I decided to take a different route via the country lanes. I was already half way to work but thought it would be quicker to do the lanes instead to cut out the long queue leading up to the roundabout. Well instead of going the usual route, I thought I would try this other way as it was bound to lead to the same part of the lane – wrong move.

Twenty minutes later and I was lost- now how do you explain that to your boss- sorry I’m late but I got lost. Lost on the way to work???? That seems really believable seen as I have been there for nearly a year.

Well I finally managed to find my way and the shortcut led me right back to the beginning of my journey but even further out of my town so I now had longer to travel then I would if I had just stayed in the bloody traffic. Oh well- typical me- just one of those days I suppose.

Until the next……

About egyptna

Traveler, actress and author who believes in positive frequencies and the law of attraction. Continually striving to be a better person - to learn, love and accept more about myself and others. This universe is full of wonderful things - it's down to us to open our eyes and see them and make the most of our time here. #letsmakeitcount
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2 Responses to Why are things so complicated

  1. Fantastic site, I hadn’t noticed egyptna.wordpress.com earlier during my searches!
    Carry on the fantastic work!


  2. t’s such a great site. imaginary, extraordinarily intriguing!!!





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